I don't know why things has to be this way,
Is not like it happen today,

This is not a poem or a poetry,
But something to express myself lately,

Why must everyone has broken heart,
And why must I be the one suffering this all,

In this fine day,
But can't do as you may,

Life is a miracle,
But we still need an optical,

A broken heart,
is just like a broken soul,

But no 1 ever knows,
Why thing like this goes,

Just can't help to stop thinking,
Cause tat what is making me cracking,

But all I can say is this,
That you should never miss,

God is with us and victory is on ourside,
Don't worry about anything cause is all nonsense outside.

- LiFe -

You do not need to see your feet in order to walk,

You need only have faith that your feet are there.

The words you choose to tell the truth,

Are as important as the decision to be truthful.

So no matter the size of something now,

it began on something smaller...

( Just a short passage about Friends)

Friendship is a promise spoken by heart..

It's not given by pledge..

It's not written on papers..

It's a promise renewed everytime we keep in touch..

If you like a girl...

If you like a girl...
Leave her cute text messages.
Kiss her in front of your friends.
Trust her over everyone else.

Tell her she looks beautiful.
Look her in the eye when you talk to her.
Tell her stupid jokes to make her laugh.
Let her mess with your hair.

Mess with HER hair.
Just walk around with her.
Include her in most things you do.When she cries do whatever to make her smile.
Forgive her for her mistakes.

Look at her like she's the only girl you see.
Tickle her even if she says stop.
Hold her hand even when you are around your friends.
When she starts swearing at you tell her you love her.

Let her fall asleep in your arms.
Get her mad, then kiss her.
Tease her and let her tease you back.
Stay up with her all night when she's sick.

Watch her favorite movie.
KiSS HER FOREHEAD.
Give her the world.
WRiTE HER LETTERS.

Let her know she is important.
Let her take all the photos of you whenever she wants.
Kiss her in the rain.
If u really love her, take care of her well.

Don't play with her heart, or feelings.
Make her feel special, and dun ever be like me,
To hurt ppl's feelings or to play her heart,
Or God will seriously punish you.

Listen to me my friends,
If you love a girl,
Love her whole heartedly.
Remember,When you really fall in love with her, tell her.And when you do tell her.. Love her like you never loved before...

The Angel With the Rainbow Umbrella

Her soul called mine...
in a time caught in forever...
it was eternity defined...
our eyes locked in seemingly countless hours...
without words nor a whimper...
our hearts knew what to say...
doors opened then we understood...
love- the only thing existing between us...
in a next faster than a moment we held each other's hands...
erasing the past, rewriting the future...
with a mutual thought...
agreed in together...
but the gods became angry...
together is to exist in stolen time...
it was not to be hers, nor to be mine...
so the Angel with the rainbow umrella passed by...
my soul met her, then bade goodbye...

New Year Resolution
i guess no one believes in resolutions anymore... but i still. i still need to guide myself towards a better path this upcoming year. for last year i must say that i have not fullfilled all that i aimed for to change in myself. i find it troubling that rather than being changed for the better, i became closer to being worse and very far from the person i want to be. i pray for God's guidance since i am literally nothing without Him. If everything else fails, i know i still have Him. So... for the upcoming year 2006 these are what i have hoped to change.
passion - as i observed in the past, most of my failures rooted to loss of interest. Sad to say but i still don't know why or what it takes me to put my mind into something. Maybe the fact that my past is coming after me... i hope not.
cleanin out my closet - as i have said i became a worse person that i am since before. i lied, cheated, fooled everybody around me. i have kept secrets that i know would hurt everybody i know. i want to let "it" out, i just need the courage to do so.
take my commitments by the heart - all of my resolutions are indeed not taken by the heart. but i still like to make them anyway for me to see or analyze myself. truth is i cannot decipher myself sometimes. maybe i should start with this hmmm... = )
i only have two years for now because im still makin up for the resolutions for last year. i hope that my friends help me attain my goals. i'm really positive that this resolution will work out fine since i did not need to keep them by memory anymore.... Just looking forward to next year... a better year.. but by starting now......

Sunday Rain

It's sunday and i find myself succumbing to the pressure of slinging back to reality.

The sky is dark.

Really... i can't help myself. Te air is cool, the bed is warm. Can i stay? I'll buy you an ice cream tomorrow.

Soft dribbles of rain.

Picture drawn was slowly blurring... twisting... twirling... Hey where are you going?

Moist air touches my cheeks.

Dizzy... soo dizzy. I wake up with a start. Pausing to catch my breath. Slowly caressing my freezing skin.

The sound of thunder.

I rest my head on my pillows. Consuming in deep thought. Nostalgic... Deja vu?

Sharp pain in the middle of the chest.

Deep cut, like a glorious wound in a night's war. I feel weak. No... more like void.

That smile.

The last thing she left me with before stabbing me right at the heart.

Fully awake.

To the fact that my room was complete with her but is completely abandoned at her absence.

Alone.

The truth. The inevitable. It's raining and my cheeks are wet with strange warmness. It is raining on a Sunday,while the sun is smiling on the barren sky outside.

Stupidity.

One may say, to grasp something that is completely intangible, and think that it will stay there forever. Humans are empty vessels with the hunger to love and be loved.

Truly, the empty ones do no last.

How it is to Love

I used to be completely cruel and heartless,
Using frens, then tossing them aside.
I used to feel an angry, bitter hunger,
Not knowing why, nor looking much inside.

I used to think the goal in life is self pleasure,
My own, of course, whatever that might take.
A woman's feelings had to be her problem.
Self-sacrifice was always a mistake.

And so with just the slightest twinge of conscience,
I hunted for my lonely ecstacy,
And even when i wanted a companion,
The only one i cared about was me.

We make our worlds, like God, in our own image.
Mine was a metropolis of stone,
In which all souls were either fools or cynics,
Doomed to take their pleasure on their own.

And then i fell in love with you, and somehow,
Your happiness meant more to me than mine.
The desert became green and lush with flowers,
Like the sun my heart began to shine.
Like a wind i swept across the ocean,
Like a star i exploded into the night,
Like a song i held love in my hands,
And like an angel i knew that this was right.

All that i had thought was proven wrong,
With all the lies to justify my greed.
To love was to embrace the pith of Life,
To feel a joy far stronger than a need.

And if i could so love, i could be loved.
So someone might want me and believe love.
To let another know me without shame,
To give myself and know that i could.

All this i tell you that i might be known,
That all of me will no longer be alone,
And if you do not love the one that i am,
So be it... I may weep, but understand....

Breaking? More like straining!!
Yup... yesterday on 13 augz, means just now if u lokk at the time,..was a great day of pop, locking, breaking, street, and stuff... wow practise until ermmm... almost 12 am till 1... but tat is still early... too bad at tat time I got sick, over dose of energy, high fever and whole body in pain man... but it was a great day with u guys out there, expecially Joel Tan, NicHoLai, and other instructerz....wow.. and hope u guys, my frens could pray 4 me so tat i could heal fast n practise again... thankz.... tomz™

Have Faith

"I wish you bluebirds in the spring
To give your heart a song to sing
And then a kiss
But more than this I wish you love

And in July a lemonade
To cool you in some leafy glade
I wish you health
And more than wealth

I wish you love
My breaking heart and I agree
That you and I could never be
So with my best, my very best

I set you free*
I wish you shelter from the storm
A cozy fire to keep you warm
But most of all

When snowflakes fall
I wish you love"
such great words yah? : )

Comments on Comments

For the second series of “Comments on Comments”, I’ll tackle the comments and responses that I, honestly, never expected to hear from people. I mean, I’ll always expect praises and flames, but these are the comments and questions that I never really thought I’d read. None of them are bad though!

Comment: “You’re just too young!”
My First Response: “Thank you, except for the ‘too’ part.”Thinking about it: Honestly, I get this comment a lot of times, even outside my blog. If you asked people who’ve met me in person, a lot of them say that my face and my stature give them the impression that I look so old! Well, no big deal to me. My ‘age problem’ only bothers me if and only if they use it as a basis for not listening to what I have to say. Everyone has episodes wherein people didn’t listen to him/her just because they were either ‘too young’ or ‘too old’. When people listen to what I have to say even if they know how ‘young’ I am, I really appreciate that.

Comment: “Can you write my story too?”
My First Response: “but I can’t…”Thinking about it: Some people send me messages telling me that I know how to write a good story, and they would want me to write them an article about their own stories. Honestly, it wouldn’t be much of a problem for me. However, I do believe that there’s nobody in the world that can do a better job at writing your own story than you. No matter how hard I try to write somebody else’s story (unless I was there), the result will never be as good as the result when you do it yourself. If Kimo was alive, or if the Crisis Zone arcade machine could speak, they’d do a better job at making us cry or keeping us on our toes!

Comment: “Can I ask for advice? My situation is like this…”
My First Response: *reads intently*Thinking about it: I’ve gotten a few messages lately that sought advice from me about their own problems. I read them intently and I try to answer them as best as I can. I appreciate the fact that people are willing to blurt out their whole lives to complete strangers, and that appreciation alone gives me enough strength to answer the questions. After all, reading through them would probably take me about ten minutes, and answering their mail would take me another ten. What’s twenty minutes of my time compared to that guy/girl’s whole lifetime? I try my best to answer the questions based on what I think should be done, but I just want to say that I’m really not an expert on problems; I find it hard to solve my own! *laughs*

Comment: “How did you get your blog featured?”
My First Response: “I wish I knew.”Thinking about it: One day, I just went up to my computer to do a little work, and I was so surprised to find that my blog got featured! I don’t know how it happened, or who decided upon it; it just happened. I guess it’s a blessing.

Comment: “What’s your secret in writing your articles?”
My First Response: “I will not tell you!” *evil laugh*Thinking about it: If the people who’re asking this are referring to the spelling and grammar, I’d honestly say that I let Microsoft Word do most of the correcting jobs for me. If you’re referring to my writing style, well, I don’t have a secret. The way I write is the way I speak—dreamy yet solid, realistic yet idealistic, detailed yet straight to the point. Confused?... yeah, I am too. *laughs*

Comment: “Are you taking up a journalism course?”
My First Response: “well, no…”Thinking about it: I don’t really know why I get this question a lot. I’m taking up a degree in Business Management, and the only English words I encounter are books, newspapers and cable TV. But then again, we get lots of English exposure in my business course, because I think a good business requires good communication skills, so I guess that’s it. On the other hand, I do admire lots of journalists, but I guess the words ‘author’ and ‘writer’ appeal to me even more.

Comment: “I admire you for not being afraid whenever you post your opinions.”
My First Response: *sighs*Thinking about it: I don’t really deserve this. Truth be told, I am always afraid to post a new blog entry. I’m always afraid of what people will think and how people will react to the things I say. There are times when I’m afraid to open my messages and read the comments on my blog. Sometimes I just have to force myself to read the comments on my blog, even if there’s the chance that some of them may be negative. I mean, who’d want to hear the message that’s long, but when summarized, say something like “you suck!”, right? However, because I do aspire to become a good writer, I have to get over that fear. I’ll never grow up and mature as a good writer if I’ll always let my fears get ahead of me and prevent me from doing what I love to do. I guess I’ll always be afraid, but with the help of the people who continue to inspire me to write more blog entries (you know who you are!) I’m starting to learn to let that fear inspire me rather than consume me.

Comment: “I’ve read your blog. Pardon me, but I think (insert flame here)…”
My First Response: *reads comment*Thinking about it: I really want to thank the people who send me messages like this. Although they flame me in a certain sense, I’m still very grateful that they go to extreme lengths to show respect. It’s easier to take in messages like this rather than those that start with “Hey, (insert insult here), (insert flame here)…”, and I appreciate their show of respect very much. Again, as I said before, it’s nice to hear criticism from a reader rather than blind insults from somebody who clearly didn’t read!

Comment: “I’m eagerly waiting for ‘Comments on Comments part 2’!”My First Response: *smiles* Thinking about it: Well, here it is! lolz....